On March 13, I finished a job at a company I had worked for, for the previous 13 years. It felt scary to leave, but I was so sure and ready. I was eager to start thinking about what my life might look like after culinary school. I was scheduled to start a new job on March 18. To say I was about to start my dream job might be a little short sited. However, I believed it was the first step on my new path. I was going to be working as an assistant in the Meredith Test Kitchen. I was nervous and excited, and then the unimaginable happened: the entire world shut down.
I understand that people everywhere have lost so much. I know people who have Covid-19, died from Covid-19, had family members pass away alone, had funerals postponed, had weddings rescheduled, pay cuts, and lost jobs. I have friends that are health care workers and can't stay home. My friends and family are parenting full-time while working full-time at home all day, every day. It's a hard and horrible time. This is my story and how Covid-19 has affected me.
We decided to start staying home on March 15. On March 16, my new job started to get postponed about two weeks at a time until indefinitely. At this time, I don't know when or if my position will resume.
It was a huge deal for me to start culinary school. I had a good job, with all the responsible adult things like a 401k, PTO, and stock options. I am almost 40 years old. When I decided to start culinary school, I wasn't expecting it to be in the middle of a worldwide pandemic. My initial reaction was, how could this be happening to me. I uprooted my whole life, and an indefinite quarantine was NOT part of the plan.
The first couple of weeks were incredibly scary and overwhelming. I had no idea if I was going to be able to finish school or start my new job. I struggle with anxiety in an ordinary world. I manage my anxiety with lists, calendars, spreadsheets, and Lexapro. So, I started making grocery lists and meal plans.
I knew one thing, we had to eat dinner every night. I could manage that. I have cooked every single day since March 15. This is not a brag or a statement to make anyone feel less than. For me, it's how I'm coping with unemployment and loss of control.
I quickly realized that school is going to look different; work is going to look different. I was going to have to figure out a way to be ok with the unknown. I was going to have to take it one meal at a time. I was going to have to trust that I can get through this. I am smart, capable, and I am doing what I love. I made the right choice for my life: pandemic or no pandemic. My goals don't have to change because a job I really wanted fell through. I am in control of my choices in any situation. I choose to show my love for the world through food.